When Someone Asked Me About My...

When someone asked me about my relationship with my ex that didn't work out, I simply answer:

Religion. Hindi kasi marunong sumamba sa tunay na Diyosa!

Hehehe =D

What Is A Short Thing That Gets...

What is a short thing that gets longer when you hold it, passes between your breasts, and enters into a hole?

Hehehe. I like how you think but it's a car's seat belt. =P

True Love Does "Make Love" And Not...

True love does "make love" and not sex...

touches the breasts, but also the heart...
sips the tongue, but kisses the lips...
had pleasure, but more on passion...

If you are thinking of someone while reading this, "'di ka na virgin" but you really love that person.

Hehehe =P

They Say Love Is Sweeter The...

They say: "Love is sweeter the second time around."

Parang mali kasi para sa akin. Feeling ko dapat ganito: "Love is sweeter KAPAG nakakaraming rounds!"

Hehehe ;)

Paglaki Ko Gusto Kong...

Paglaki ko, gusto kong maging... Sa Iyo!

Oha, yun ang banat! Wahahaha =D

What Is The Most Sensitive Part...

What is the most sensitive part of the body during sexual intercourse?

Ah, eh di EARS! Duh?! Why kamo? Kasi it can easily hear footsteps coming... "May tao! May tao!"

Hehehehehe ;P

Stop Chasing Until...

Stop chasing until you're ready to catch me.

Asteeg, di ba?! Hehehe ;)

By Persistently Remaining Single...

By persistently remaining single, I am slowly converting myself into a permanent public temptation.

Hahaha ;P

Do You Have Sex Appeal?

Do you have sex appeal? Here's a simple experiment:

Go to a place crowded with children. Stand or sit in one place without making any effort to be noticed. If children smile at you without calling their attention, you've got sex appeal.

The theory is that children's emotions are spontaneous because they do not yet experience emotional disturbances unlike adults. Your partner may lie, but a child won't. Ü

The Eggs Have Decided To Fight...

The eggs have decided to fight against sperms.

One night, they wait with guns in the pussy but no one came.

Suddenly, one egg shouted, "Cowards! They're attacking from behind!" :D

Why Are Condoms Transparent?

Why are condoms transparent? So that the sperm can at least enjoy the scenery!

Nyahahaha ;o)

Sexy Facts of Life...

Sexy facts of life:
(1) Fate is like getting raped--if you cannot fight it, learn to enjoy it.
(2) Work is like a gang bang--ten people are behind your ass to take your place.
(3) Education is like hiring a prostitute--it needs both money and hard work.
(4) Success is like masturbation--only your own hand can let you achieve it.

Green, pero may point naman, hindi ba? ;)

Family Planning Advisory...

If you want to practice safe sex, do it with the same sex!

Hihihi =P

Tips Para Sa First Timers

Tips para sa first timers:

1. Relax lang.
2. Ibuka ng mabuti at dahan-dahan.
3. Mag-concentrate.
4. Tiisin ng kaunti ang sakit.
5. Sabihin kung nagdurugo...

and

6. Magtiwala sa dentista.

Ikaw ha?! Hehehe ;o)

Three Important Stars To Live LiKe In...

Three (3) important stars to live like in life:

1. party like a rock star;
2. look like a movie start; and, lastly
3. make love like a porn star!

Be one of those today! =o)

GF, BF, At Ang Pagmamahal Factor...

GF: Gaano mo ba ako kamahal?

BF: (Hinawakan ang kamay ni GF at inilagay sa loob ng brief) Ikaw lang ang dahilan sa bawat pagtigas nito.

Ang sweet! Hehehe ö

Always Wear Cute Pyjamas Before...

Always wear cute pyjamas before you go to sleep because you never know whose gonna take them off in your dreams. ;o)

What Do You Call A Naked, Sexy...

What do you call a naked, sexy, beautiful woman on the arms of an ugly man?

Tattoo! Tattoo lang yan, mga chong!

Hahaha ;-D

Sabi Nila Ang Disneyland Daw Ang...

Sabi nila ang Disneyland daw ang pinaka-happiest place on the balat of Earth.

Hay naku, try ninyo sa piling ko baka magbago ang pananaw mo sa Disneyland na 'yan. ;P<

Boy 1 & Boy 2 Being Note-y...

Boy 1: Pare, musikero ka ba?
Boy 2: Bakit?
Boy 1: Pinapataas mo kasi yung nota ko eh.

Bwahahaha =D Naughty day to all!