Paalala Ng Isang Airline...

Paalala ng isang airline sa mga pasahero:

"We are now preparing to land in San Francisco International Airport. Should you need any assistance, please do not hesitate to ask us. We hope you enjoyed your flight."

Paalala sa mga Pilipinong pasahero:

"Ang mga kutsara, tinidor, plato, unan, kumot, tuwalya, tutbras, tutpeyst, laypbes, at iba pang gamit panghimpapawid dito sa eroplano ay hindi po pasalubong. Maraming salamat po."

Ang cruel! Hehehe ;-D

A Friend Is One Of The Nicest...

A friend is one of the nicest things you can have and one of the best things you can be. Friendships isn't a big thing--it's a million little things.

Mapagpalang araw sa iyo, kaibigan!

If We Contemplate On The Past For...

If we contemplate on the past for too long, we pass up the chance to change and grow.

Whether we like it or not, it takes extra effort to accommodate changes in our lives.

We have to make choices.
We have to make space.
We have to let things go.
We have to let things change.

Have a nice weekend! :-D

A Short Hello Makes You...

A short "hello" makes you glow.
A short "hi" makes you smile.
A short "text" makes your day great!

But a short "prayer" will make a big difference.

By The Time You Realize That...

By the time you realize that what your brain said was right for your heart, you already have a broken heart with a mind that begins to think you are wrong.

In Love, You Have To Expect Absence At...

In love, you have to expect absence at some pint but that does not mean it's the end. All you have to do is wait. Give the person space because true love is proved when a person has seen the best people in the world but still turns back to where you are, reaches for your hand and chooses you above the world's best.

Learn to wait for the best! ;)

Ang Tunay Na Friend Ipagmamalaki...

Ang tunay na friend, ipagmamalaki mo. Nakasuporta sa iyo. Di ka ibabagsak. Kumportable ka. Mahigpit ang kapit. At malapit sa puso mo.

Parang...

Bra. :-P

Silipin Ang Gitna...

Silipin ang gitna.
Salatin ang hiwa.
Ibuka ng bahagya.
Dilaan ang gitna.
Paglabas ng puti.
Namnamin ng mabuti.

And that's how you eat Oreo cookies! Hehehe =P

I Knocked Heaven's Door One Day...

I knocked heaven's door one day and God asked me, "What can I do for you?"

"Favor po," I told him, "please love, protect, and bless the one reading this message."

He smiled and said, "Always."

Have a great day ahead! (.^-^.)

Caring For Someone Does Not Necessarily...

Caring for someone does not necessarily mean texting everyday but making time to greet and pray for them even in our busiest day.

Hope you're always fine! God bless you! ;)

In Times When You're Sad About...

In times when you're sad about what's going on in your life, just remember one permanent fact: Everything Changes.

Tomorrow will be different.

Have a very inspiring day! c",)

Kung Tutuusin, Hindi Naman Masarap...

Kung tutuusin, hindi naman masarap ang alak. Yung mga kainuman lang ang nagpapasarap.

At minsan, yung kainuman mo ang masarap! Right? Hahahaha =D

We Make A Living By...

We make a living by what we get.

We make a life by what we give.

May your generous heart always be blessed! ;-)

Question: How Many Words In The Dictionary...

Question: How many words in the dictionary can be used to describe ugly?

Answer: Only two words -- "Not Us".

Agree? Pwede ring -- "Just Them".

Hihihi =D

God Is Always At Work In...

God is always at work in you that's why you always have to be confident in everything you do. God is not just beside you or behind you... He is in you. Always.

We Will Open The Book. Its Pages...

We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity, and its first chapter is New Year's Day. ~ Edith Lovejoy Pierce

Happy 2009! ;)

The 365 Days Of Our 2008 Are...

The 365 days of our 2008 are almost over, and while we're still on the last day, let me thank you for being a special part of my 2008!

Let's altogether thank God for all that has been and all that will be. A prosperous 2009 to you! ;-P

2008 Is Nearing Its End...

2008 is nearing its end. We smile as we look back at happy moments and look forward for a better year.

Wishing you and your family not just happiness but pure joy, not just wealth but heavens of treasures, and not just silence but God's peace. Cheers to the new year!

Always Welcome A New Day...

Always welcome a new day with a

"smile"
on your
"lips"

"love"
in your
"heart"


"good thoughts"
in your
"mind"

and
you will have
a wonderful new year.

Vive Bene, Spesso L'Amore, Di...

"Vive bene, spesso l'amore, di risata molto."

Translation:
Live well, love much, laugh often.

It's a new start for us! Happy New Day!

Past Is An Experience, Present Is...

Past is an "experience".
Present is an "experiment".
Future is an "expectation".

Don't forget to use your experience in your experiment to meet your expectation this new year.

A Beautiful Year, A Relaxed Mind...

A beautiful year,
a relaxed mind,
a peaceful soul,
a healthy body,
a loving heart,
and answered prayers.

These are my New Year wishes for you and your loved ones. (",)

May The New Year Bring New...

May the new year bring new hopes, new promises, and new reasons to celebrate your presence in your lives. God bless you and may you have a joyous new year!

Maligaya Ba Ang 2008 Mo...

Maligaya ba ang 2008 mo?

Kung OO, sana magpatuloy. Kung HINDI naman, bawi tayo ngayong bagong taon.

Kampi tayo ngayong 2009 ha! =D

It's The First Day Of The Year...

It's the first day of the year and just a peace of thought for you:

Live freely
Love Freely
Live and let others live
I will look forward to my everyday so I hope you do too.

2009, here we are! ^_^

Before Everyone Gets Busy Preparing...

Before everyone gets busy preparing and enjoying, here's wishing you happiness with spice and everything nice! A prosperous new year to you and your family! May the coming year fill you with so much joy!

Apology Can Never Bring Back The...

Apology can never bring back the tears that had fallen. It can't even let you forget the pain that you've felt, but it surely refreshes a wounded pride and relationship.

Apology is the best damage control.

Let's all start the year right, okay?

The Year Is Closed, The Record...

The year is closed, the record made, the last deed done, the last word said, the memory alone remains, of all its joys, its griefs, its gains. And now with purpose full and clear, we turn to meet another year. ~ Robert Browning

Happy New Year, everyone! Thanks for the meaningful 2008!

May God's Blessings And The Miracle...

May God's blessings and the miracle of the new year fill every part of your world with joy, peace, and happiness. Happy 2009!

God Specializes In Giving People...

God specializes in giving people a fresh start. ~ Rick Warren

Embrace the new year! Make the most of it and enjoy more blessings form God. Happy 2009 to you!

May The Wonderful Feelings Of The...

May the wonderful feelings of the holidays stay with you and your loved ones. Happy araw! ;)

God Does Not Seek Out Our...

God does not seek out our capabilities to serve Him. He seeks out our availability. ~ Zechariah 4:6

God's love to you today and always! Masayang weekend ahead! =D

Dati Ang Gamot Sa Sakit Ng...

Dati ang gamot sa sakit ng ulo ay "kiss-pirin" at "yakap-sul".

Ngayon, di na raw uso ang mga yun! Ano na?

Eh di Bioge-Sex! Kahit walang laman ang tiyan, safe. Sige, ingat!

Hehehe =D

If You Miss An Opportunity...

If you miss an opportunity, do not cloud your eyes with tears. Keep your vision clear so that you wouldn't miss the next one.

It's Hard To Fall In Love Again...

It's hard to fall in love again when you're still attached to your past love. You must learn to let go and open your heart to someone else. It's not always the easy thing to do, but sometimes you just have to.

Sometimes We're All Caught Up In...

Sometimes we're all caught up in the idea of pleasing everybody. In the end, we're the ones who tend to be unhappy. It's not wrong to follow your heart or to defy all the odds. Live your life the way you want it to be, share it with someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. Because, after all, more than anything else, the general rule is pleasing the Almighty and not fearing the second rate opinion of somebody else. =)

Si Inday, Ang Pari, At Ang Delusion...

Inday: Father, I confess, every time po na titingin ako sa ibang babae during the mass, I realize that I'm the prettiest girl sa parokya. Is that a sin ho ba?

Priest: No, Inday. It's a joke.

Hehehe :-D

We Can Be Fine Even When Others...

We can be fine even when others do not have a good opinion of us. After all, what matters is not what others think of us but what we think of ourselves.

A truly intelligent person is one who can pretend to be a fool in front of a fool who pretends to be intelligent.

Behind Every Event Is God's...

Behind every event is God's purpose.

At times what we consider a trial is simply His permission for us to rearrange our lives to be more meaningful.

Laugh at detours, friends! Happy day! ;)

Pasosyal Na Girl Sa Bus...

Pasosyal na girl sa bus...

Girl: Manong conductor, can you get my luggage please? Medyo it's kinda bigat kasi.

Konduktor: Asan ba dito, miss?

Girl: Uhmm.. Yun o, the sako.

Amf! Nyahahaha ;-D

Ang Love Life Ko Ay Parang...

Ang love life ko ay parang yung bagong Coke... Zero!

Hahaha ;-P

Letting Go Is Like A Getting A...

Letting go is like getting a tooth pulled out from a dentist.

Pull it out, you're relieved. But how many times does your tongue run itself over the spot where the tooth once was? Probably a hundred times a day. Just because it wasn't hurting you doesn't mean you don't notice it. It leaves a gap and sometimes you see yourself missing it terribly. It's going to take a while, but it takes time.

Should you have kept the tooth? No, because it was causing you so much pain.

Waiting for Someone You Love Is...

Waiting for someone you love is never easy especially when, while you're waiting, the one you're waiting for is not aware that you're waiting...

~ Tongue-twister 'yan. H'wag kang mag-emote! Hmmm... Hahaha! :-D

Three Beautiful Morning Messages...

Three beautiful morning messages:

1. In God's eyes, love is always present.
2. In God's heart, forgiveness is always there.
3. In God's embrace, no one is ever alone.

Sometimes God Closes The...

Sometimes God closes the door and locks the windows. During those times, it's nice to think that maybe there's a storm outside and He just wants you safe with Him.

Hug Him tight! Good day po! ;-)

Pagod Na Pagod Na Akong Humawak Ng...

Pagod na pagod na akong humawak ng balls mo! Pagod na rin ako sa pagbihis-hubad mo sa akin. Malapit na naman ulit, ayoko na!

~ Christmas Tree.

Somebody Once Told Me...

Somebody once told me, "Be strong. Remember, not everything has a happy ending and endings don't mean stop."

It's just a way of telling us that there's a new beginning ahead of us. You should always be ready for the unpredictable and expect the unexpected.

It's easy to fall, hard to get up. But once you're up and back on track. You will be a better person.

That's the way of life! You don't just live it, you learn from it.

If Your Heart Is Aching, Cry Out...

If your heart is aching, cry out loud because even though I hate to see your tears falling, I hate it most to see your sipon bubbling. Hehehe ;-P

Sometimes We Wanna Say To A Certain...

Sometimes we wanna say to a certain person:

You suck! You're insensitive, inconsiderate, selfish, cruel, and thoughtless! You're someone who don't deserve to be cared for by a person like me. I wish you could just disappear so you couldn't hurt me!

But when we open our mouths to say it, it comes out a li'l softer like: I Love You. Ü

What Do You Call A Naked, Sexy...

What do you call a naked, sexy, beautiful woman on the arms of an ugly, poor man?

TATTOO. Tato lang yun!

O, wag masyadong mag-isip. Baka tumirik ang utak, hehe. Ü

God Provided Us With A...

God provided us with a good-looking face.

We just have to provide the expression.

So keep smiling and keep looking good! Happy day! =)

Be Happy With What You Have...

Be happy with what you have while working for what you want.

Remember, a happy successful life begins with a "Thank you, Lord, for what I have."

Have a blessed day! Ü

When God Gives You One Important...

When God gives you one important thing in life, never hold it too tight!

So when he asks you to give it back, it's easy to let go without you hurting so bad.

Maraming Bagay Ang Gumugulo Sa...

Maraming bagay ang gumugulo sa isip ko. Bukod sa buhay pag-ibig, pamilya, barkada, mawalan ng load--dagdag gulo pa sa utak ko ay ang English ng santol.

Tama ba ang "wheredude"? ;-P

Masakit Magmahal, Nakakatakot Magmahal...

Masakit magmahal. Nakakatakot magmahal. At mahirap ring magmahal.

Pero, di ba, mas masakit, nakakatakot, at mahirap kapag nalaman mong... ikaw si Mahal?

Nyehehehe! Jowk! Churi, churi! ;-P

Daga 1, Daga 2, at Daga 3...

Daga 1: Ako tapang! Kain ako Racumin.

Daga 2: Mas tapang ako! Kain ako cheese with mouse trap!

Daga 3: Ako tapang sa lahat!

Daga 1 and Daga 2: Bakit?!

Daga 3: Kasi girlfriend ko pusa!

Makes sense?

Be brave enough to love someone whom you know might kill or hurt you in the end.

Speak When You're Angry And...

Speak when you're angry and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.

Holds true most of the time, no? ;(

Some Funny Facts About Friends...

Some funny facts about friends:

50% of them know you and like you because of the favors you do for them.

30% of them have seen you at your best.

15% of them shared your pain.

But, only 5% of them knows the real story of your entire life.

Theoreticall Speaking: Accepting...

Theoretically speaking:

Accepting and trying to move on sounds easy, right?

But, the application of that theory means: Die first and live again.

It Takes A Thousand Sweet...

It takes a thousand sweet efforts to build a great relationship.

Yet, one fatal error can destroy everything you have started.

Grabe Ang Mga Pick-Up Lines...

Grabe ang mga pick-up lines, no? Ang dami na, sobra. Wala na nga akong maisip eh... kundi ikaw!

Wahahaha! Yun yung banat eh! =D

Ang Magkumpare At Ang Spelling...

Pare 1: Pare, pare! Ano ba ang spelling ng orange?

Pare 2: Pambihira! Yun lang di mo alam? Alin ba: yung prutas o yung kulay?

*toink* Haha! Ü

Front View, Side View, Rear...

Front View
Side View
Rear View
Top View

Sa kahit ano pang view... I LoView!

Nyahahaha! Bagong banat lang! Happy araw! Ü

Alam Mo Ba Na 10% Lang...

Alam mo ba na 10% lang sa Africa ang maitim?

Totoo! Kasi yung 90% sobrang itim!

Hehe :)

Since Light Is Faster Than...

Since light is faster than sound, people seem bright.

Until you hear them speak.

Di ba?! Makes sense. Hehe Ü

Some of Us Have Been Through Lots...

Some of us have been through lots of tests... and, I know most of us copied.

Learn from other's mistakes! Ü 

It Hurts to Love Someone When...

It hurts to love someone when you can't even tell that someone what you really feel. Sometimes you get hurt without him knowing. You get jealous yet you have no right to feel that way. You want his time yet you're not in the position to demand for it. Your heart is breaking in silence.

But, despite of this, you continue to love because somehow in this hurtful love, there are still happy thoughts and simple moments to look forward to.

Si Inday, Si Sir, At Ang Milagrong Ginagawa Nila...

Inday: Sir, baka mahuli tayo ni Ma'am...

Sir: Wala naman dito ang Ma'am mo! Laging nasa office yun.

Inday: Eh hindi po kasi tama itong ginagawa nating "milagro".

Sir: Pwes! Don't worry! O sige, ayusan mo ulit ako at make-upan. Gusto ko yung tulad kahapon para mataray! Go!

The Best Date Is With Someone Who...

The best date is with someone who can take you anywhere without touching anything but your heart.

Pero, aminin natin, iba pa rin yung medyo manyak, di ba?! Hehe Ü

Hubby, Wifey, And The 8th Wonder...

Hubby: Dear, to me you are the 8th wonder of the world!

Wifey: You son of a b*tch!!! Don't you ever, ever, ever let me catch you with the other seven!

Uh, hehehe? :-D

Si Juan, Si Inday, At Ang Shampoo...

Juan: Lintik na shampoo 'to! Ayaw bumula!

Inday: Nako ser, panu pu yan magkabula eh de naman pu basa yong bohok nenyo.

Juan: Tanga! For dry hair to! Dry hair! Eto o, basahin mo!

Hihihi ;-}

In A Hotel Elevator A Man...

In a hotel elevator a man accidentally elbows a lady's breast...

Man: If your heart is as soft as your breast, you will forgive me.

Lady: If your bird is as hard as your elbow, I'm in Room 23.

Pwede! Hehehe ;-P

If Flirting Is A Sport...

If flirting is a sport...

I'm so sure varsity ka na! ;D

Jawless, Jawless, Jawless...

Jawless. Jawless.

Jawless Bekshop! Nagabek ng kek, kukess, at iba pang brid sama sa chess brid, monggo brid, at igg brid.

Jawless! =)

Saan ka?! Dito Ako Sa Welding...

Saan ka?! Dito ako sa welding shop. Try ko lang po buuin yung naputol nating relasyon.

Awww *blush* Hanep sa banat! Hehehe ;)

Sino Ang Pinakatangang Babae Sa...

Sino ang pinakatangang babae sa mundo? Eh di si Eba! Kasi nakita na nga niyang hubo't hubad si Adan pero mansanas pa rin ang isinubo niya.

Dalawang Nerd Na Nagtatalo...

Dalawang nerds na nagtatalo.

Nerd 1: Alam mo, E=MC2 ka. Epal = Masyadong Corny squared!

Nerd 2: Weh?! Ikaw F=MA. Feeling = Masyado kasing Absorbed!

Nerd 1: E ikaw, P=MV. Panget = Masyado pang Vain!

Nerd 2: Nyee, e ikaw W=MG. Wangbu = na May Galis!

Nerd 1: Sus! Ikaw nga e I={MR. Ikaw = pinagsamang Moronic reincarnation ng Rats!

Nerd 2: Josme! Yun lang?! E ikaw nga K=P+1/2PV2+HPG! Kumag = Praning na medyo Pogi kuno pero Vainglorious Vermin naman! Hambog Pa at mukhang Galunggong!

Masayang day to you! Hehehe :-)

Naisip Ko Na Kahit Centrum...

Naisip ko na kahit Centrum ang inumin mo, kung wala naman ako sa buhay mo--never ka pa ring magiging COMPLETE!

Hehehe ;-P

I Can Hide The Pain That I...

I can hide the pain that I feel and make others think that I have already move on. But, I can never deny that truth that the person who failed and hurt me is still the same person I wish to love me.

Ang BF, Ang GF, At Ang Pangangaliwa...

BF: Hon, paano kung malaman mo may ibang babae akong mahal?

GF: Wala lang... Huhugutin ko lang naman ang lalamunan mo tapos isasaksak ko sa baga mo then babalatan kita at lalagyan ng asin at saka kalamansi yung flesh mo. Tapos yung sword of glory mo puputulin ko at gagawin kong sabit-sabit sa pinto namin. Bakit mo naman naitanong?

BF: (lumunok ng malaki) Curious lang. Labsyu!

Bwahahaha =D

Practice The Pause...

Practice the pause!

When in doubt, pause.
When angry, pause.
When tired, pause.
When stressed, pause.

And when you pause, pray! Then breathe.

Clear the mind. View from a different perspective then smile! And laugh, too.

Even your heart needs to rest.

Pinakamasarap Na Feeling Sa Mundo Ay...

Pinakamasarap na feeling sa mundo ay yung tititigan mo pa lang ang crush mo pero siya nakatingin na sa iyo at naghuhubad pa! Nyahahaha =D

A Five-Year Old Kid Got...

A five-year old kid got jealous on his new born brother. That night, he put poison on his mother's nipples. The next morning he can't go to school because their driver died! Saklap, no? Hehehe :)

Go for Someone Who Is Not Only...

Go for someone who is not only proud to have you but someone who is willing to take every risk just for an hour  with you.

Awwww *^_^*

Kung Gagawa Ka Ng Isang Bagay...

Kung gagawa ka ng isang bagay na hindi pa naiimbento, ano 'yun?

Ako? Gagawa ako nito...

Red Horse Capsule 500mg! Isang tableta lang, sapul agad! Ito ang tama!

Also available:

Red Horse Syrup for babies 6-12 months.
Red Horse Litro Pack - natitimplang Red Horse
Red Horse Candy - para pwede kahit may klase.

Hahaha :-D Adeek!

When Someone Is Blatantly...

When someone is blatantly flirting with you, makipag-cooperate ka naman. Hihihi ;P

History ng Foot Spa 101

Judas: Anong gimmick yang hinuhugasan ni Magdalena ang paa ni Bossing?

Peter: Huwag ka ngang makialam! Darating ang araw at tatawagin 'yang Foot Spa!

Hehehe ;-P

Avoiding Someone Has Only...

Avoiding someone has only two reasons: (a) either you hate that person, or (b) you're still in love with that person. )-:

The Most Difficult Phase of Life Is...

The most difficult phase of life is not when no one understands you.

It's when you don't understand yourself.

Be Strong. Remember, Not Everything...

Be strong. Remember, not everything has a happy ending and endings don't mean you have to stop.

It's just a way of telling us that there's a new beginning ahead of us.

You should always be ready for the unpredictable and expect the unexpected.

It's easy to fall, hard to get up, but once you're up and back on track, you will be a better person.

That's the way of life! You don't just live it--you learn from it.

According to The Ancient...

According to the ancient, the engagement ring is placed on the fourth finger of the left hand. Essence?

Because it has a vein leading directly to the heart.

Bilis Ng Panahon, No? Kailan...

Bilis ng panahon, no? Kailan lang nagkukulitan pa tayo, nagdadal-dalan, naglolokohan, nagtatawanan, nag-iiyakan, nagtatakutan. Nakakamiss din iyon. Hayaan mo. Kapag nagkita tayo, barilan naman!

Excited na ako. Ikaw? Hehe =)

Did You Know That The Darkest...

Did you know that the darkest time of the day is the minute before sunrise?

So, when you feel that you're at the darkest moment of your life, remember that the sunrise is just a minute away.

Good day! ;)

Always Live The Life You Want...

Always live the life you want to live, be the person you can be proud of. Make decisions, make mistakes. If you fall, you fell because you tried. No regrets. Embrace the total darkness in you because life is too short to be always cool. You are what you are, take it or leave it.

Two Sperms Were Swimming...

Two sperms were swimming side-by-side. One said to the other, "How far 'til we reach the fallopian tube?"

The other retorted, "Fucking miles, pare! We've only just passed the tonsils kaya."

Hehehe ;)

I Wonder Why I Cannot Kiss...

I wonder why I cannot kiss my elbows.

Then it hit me. I just realized that some things seems to be so close, yet they are bound to be beyond my reach.

I Never Gave Anyone A...

I never gave anyone a reason to hate me. They just create their own little drama of pure insecurity. ;-P

Si Titser, Si Pedro, At Ang Pingot.

On the first day of school...

Titser: Class, my name is Ms. Pruke. Ang makalimot, may pingot bukas! Okay?
Class: Yes, Ma'am.

Kinabukasan...

Titser: Pedro, what is my name?
Pedro: Ma'am... Uhm... Ano...

Miss Prek-Prek?

Bwahahahaha! Gets mo? ;-D

One Liquor Shot Reduces Life...

One liquor shot reduces life by five (5) minutes. Sex, however, increases life by 10 minutes or so.

The presupposition from these statements is this: Kahit lasenggo ka basta mahalay, matagal kang mamamatay!

Nyahahaha ;-D

When I Was In First Grade, My Teacher...

When I was in first grade, my teacher told me to write down what I wanted to be when I grow up.

I wrote down, "Happy!"

She then told me, "You didn't understand the homework, darling."

I answered back, "If you'd only disambiguated the statement, I would've written a profession like what you're insinuating right now. Also, I don't think you understand life."

Ayun, dumugo ang ilong niya. First Grader pa lang ako noon ha. Pustahan pa 'yan! ^o^